Why is it sometimes I can repeat tunes a thousand times with never ending inspiration to go with it - I can see scenes in my head, the more I play the tune the more the words start to form... and then I have moments like now when things are just blank to me where I can't see what I once saw. I don't understand it. I wish I could just have it there all the time.
Things haven't been all bad today though. Okay there's been good moments and not so good ones, but it's quite far from anything like... say Fridayish (or whenever the last time was I was down). I didn't sleep too well last night, mostly cause it was rather cold, for the first time I did actually have to switch the electric blanket on all night, and the second oh-so-not nice reason was the damn alarms that kept going off like every 20 mins outside my window. I swear by the 4th time, or even the 6th, I just gave up and dragged myself out of bed much earlier than I wanted to be. My parents went out, so I was making myself breakfast and no sooner had I sat down to talk to Julie then I started bawling my eyes out. It was all over what was in my last lj post. I don't even know why it crossed my mind while I was making breakfast. But, you know, it did go away. Oh news just informed me it was -2 last night. There ya go. Anyway... cause Russell beat me in the shower, and Melly gave me permission last night, I decided to update B's journal. Following that I had my shower then went back to my fic and finally finished up the prequel scene I needed to write. I thought I'd be able to finish the chapter but, you know, inspiration is lacking now and I don't know why. :(
To my surprise my brother came out asking me if I wanted to go to the movies, to which I jumped at the chance cause I wanted to see Fantastic Four and had no-one to go with. So we went and saw that and it was great! I love the powers and stuff. The characters were well played and it was actually quite funny. I think I'd rate it the 2nd fave comic book film after XMen. There's something I just love about XMen that I can't quite put my finger on, but far outweighs the others, and it's so good to be able to see a good movie nowadays. Mind you the kids films look like crap, but oh well... I'm not a kid anymore so I don't need to worry about that.
Anyway I've decided to steal something from Melly again since that's what I always do *snicker* But I'm cutting it *nods*ME: Who I Am and Who I'll Always Be- Name:
75 degrees? East/West (depending where you're coming from)? Round? Take a gamble (a)LOVE : The strangest feeling in the world- Are you single?
Yes- If yes, why?
Let's see... combination of high standards, inability to hold a conversation, fear of something bad happening to me (not high on the list), my tendency to run if things get too complicated, the fact that people I like don't seem to have the same opinion of me.
- If not, who’s your bf/gf? -
- Where did you meet him/her? -
- How long use been going out for? -
- What do you think of him/her? -MORE LOVE QUESTIONS :Oh No... You don't make it sound good.- Have you ever cheated on your significant other?
Why would I? If I'd love them I'd never betray them like that.- Have you ever been dumped?
Yup- If yes, why?
Their words? I'm "too nice".- Have you ever had a crush on a teacher?
Don't think so, although there have been a few nice math teachers (a) (one who gave me a rose for Valentines - only one I've ever gotten... aww)- Have you ever had a crush on someone 5-10 years older than you?
see above? *thinks* possibly?- If yes, who?
see above. And, um, celebs as well (not like teenage girls don't do that ;) ) More specifically Joey Lawrence & Jason David Frank.- Have you ever liked the same person your friend liked?
All the time *sigh* Bad to have good taste *nods* - Have you ever fought over a guy/girl with your brother or sister?
:o With my brother? Doubt it LMAO- Have your parents ever hated one of your bf/gfs?
Not hated. Mum just disliked the last one cause she was infatuated with the one b4.- Have you ever tried stealing your friends' gf/bf?
You think I'm some kind of temptress? Dude they always end up with my friends *rolls eyes*- Have you ever liked one of your friends?
Given past messy circumstances, I shall be forced to say yes :(- Have you ever dumped someone?
Yup- If yes, why?
Cause I spent the whole night after being out with him almost throwing up and worked out I was only dating him for the sake of having a boyfriend, not cause I really liked him. Needless to say it ended quickly.- Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex?
Nope- Have you ever hooked up with random?
Hooked up? Great possibilty not.- Have you ever hugged a random?
Don't think so.- Has ever someone cheated on you?
Not that I know of- What would your perfect girl/guy be like?
*goes to forum* hey, I'm lazy (a) Okay need new lines for this, and I'm gonna italicise just to be a pain *snigger** Easy to talk to - me, as you know, not very talkative. Guys I've dated in the past who are very talkative start getting annoyed with the fact I don't talk very much. BUT I've noticed with certain ppl, something in their nature, just makes me feel a little more relaxed and I can be a little more talkative with them.
* Someone who's playful, funny and imaginative
* Caring, understanding, kind, affectionate (need I go on! haha)
* Has to love animals - especially dogs. And be good with kids, cause I kind of feel sometimes that I'm not, so if I have kids one day I'd like to think that he could be there for them.
* Outgoing - in the sense that he's sociable & energetic, not overly adventurous. I mean, it's also good just to stay at home doing not much at all sometimes.
* He's got to be cute. I mean he doesn't have to be overly good looking, it could just be little things that he says or does. But looks wise - great eyes and a great smile draw me in like no other.
* He's got to love music. I'm a music nut. I need someone to drag to concerts and things, someone who's not going to argue when I'm playing the stereo all day. It'd be nice if he could dance
* Okay, definately similar interests comes to mind. Music, definately. If he liked horror movies, that would be great too. But I always wonder if those guys are freaks sometimes hehe. Just someone who enjoys the same kinds of things as me.
* One last thing, he's got to love to travel. I'm a travel bug. If I have an opportunity to go somewhere, I'll go without hesitation.- Do you believe in love at first sight?
Sure- Do you believe in love at all?
Of course I do *hugz* How could you ask such a thing? I feel very loved right now *nods*- Are you romantic?
I'd like to think so, but the very fact I suck at relationships makes me think perhaps I'm not.MUSIC : The strongest bond in the world- How many concerts have you been to?
Er... you want me to count? LMAO. Too many, sorry dude. Definately in double digits, dunno if I've hit the triple yet.- What type of music are you into?
Pop/Rock :D Only way to sum it up- What type of music do you hate?
Dance. Although people will kick me for that cause I do own dance music. Also rap not high on my list but I like Eminem. What can I say, I'm very versatile *nods*- Fave Band:
Evanescence or Lifehouse. Can't pick.- Band you hate:
Hi-5? *snicker*HAVE YOU EVER : - Seen a counsellor?
Nope. I deal with my problems on my own (yup, self-beating up is a great idea *rolls eyes*)- Psychiatrist?
No but thought about it. Also thought of being one. Then thought of seeing one cause I was one. I suck LOL- Hurt someone’s feeling on purpose?
Not intentionally. If I've said something it's cause I'm either really angry or off the planet *nods*- Skipped school?
Nope- Slept in the street?
Not on the street...- Gone skinny dipping?
Nope- Walked in the street naked?
Ridden a horse naked? *snigger* Okay... so no.- Walked out of class?
Um... not without an excuse or reason to.- Been suspended?
No- Been expelled?
Definately not.- stalked anyone?
Thought about it *snigger* But no, I'm not that dangerous ;)ARE YOU : - Obsessed with someone/something? If so, who/what?
*thinks* Can I just say Charmed and cover it all?- Sarcastic?
I'd like to think so.- Evil?
Mostly an angel (a)- A violent/aggressive person?
Wanna try me? :p Aggressive, no, violent... maybe... just a little... like pointy things and throwing things and stuff *blush*- A smoker?
No way! Ew!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Disgusting disgusting smelly yucky habit.DO YOU : - think there’s a dark side to things?
Yes *sigh* Sorry Wy but I do tend to live under Chris' "everything is good or evil, black or white" moral. But I think everybody has a dark side *nods*- Dislike smokers?
Not the people, but I hate the habit and when they smoke around me.- Go to parties often?
Nope. Hide away in my little home and am less partyish than I used to be (which wasn't very much in the first place).- Hide a secret?
Other people's, yes. My own... well I hold things back from everybody else except my close friends, and I'm quite certain they know all about me. I don't hold things about myself back from them.- Play any instruments?
guitar, keyboard *shrug* Haven't done it in a while- Have a dream/goal?
Wanted to be a writer, have had a book published, gone overseas and been married with kids by now *sigh* I now know life can't be rushed, so the only thing that makes me happy now is to do things I enjoy (like writing) and hang out with the people I love.